Lonely by choice? How to be a founder and not go crazy

The beginnings of almost every business, especially the first one in a founder's career, are a time of truly guerrilla actions. Initiating any venture requires combining many different roles at once. The founder must be a one-man band. This carries certain risks.

Lonely by choice? How to be a founder and not go crazy
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Summary

  • The Polish startup environment is thriving with over 5000 startups and 130 active venture capital funds, making it a leader in Central and Eastern Europe.
  • 64% of Polish businessmen started their own businesses due to a strong need for independence and self-reliance, which can lead to 'founder's loneliness'.
  • Since the pandemic, there has been a growing awareness of the importance of mental well-being, with female leaders more likely to suffer from chronic stress-induced ailments.
  • The psychological burden of decision-making can lead to burnout, affecting both personal life and business.
  • Bartosz Duchiński, managing partner of MU Group, advises prioritizing well-being, valuing personal time and skills, and not worrying excessively about mistakes.
  • Tomasz Piechnik, CCO of MU Group and CEO of Digitized, suggests building a trusted team and support network, and maintaining a clear customer profile and long-term business vision.
  • Founders should focus on creating and designing processes rather than performing all duties themselves, and time management is crucial.
  • Regular decompression time for reading, sports, and socializing is necessary, and regular exercise is emphasized by many top managers for its role in teaching discipline and maintaining mental health.
  • Founders often struggle with "impostor syndrome" or a lack of faith in their own abilities, especially during challenging times.
  • Running a business can be an emotional rollercoaster, with stress often leading to high levels of cortisol that disrupt the body's normal functioning.
  • It's important for business owners to understand their motivations for starting a business and to define and regularly update these goals throughout the business development process.

Our editorial colleague Jakub Rusak recently described the Polish startup environment, which compared to other European ecosystems, is really positive. We are active, we have over 5000 startups and 130 active venture capital funds. We are becoming a leader in Central and Eastern Europe. Behind these impressive numbers are specific people - founders.

Initiating a business venture requires certain predispositions. It's the domain of brave people, walking their own paths, often individualists. In the Polish Entrepreneur report, based on the ARC Market and Opinion and inFact survey, as many as 64% of the surveyed businessmen admitted that a strong need for independence and self-reliance prompted them to start their own business. The conditions for conducting business activity were best assessed by entrepreneurs from the broadly understood "information and communication" industry, i.e. IT. 

It is difficult to unambiguously interpret the "need for independence". It may result from problems with functioning in hierarchical structures, it may also mean low interpersonal competences. The report did not delve into this issue, which is a pity. Such an analysis of one's own hidden motives requires a large dose of self-awareness, which is often acquired by trial and error. Its catalyst is often difficult experiences, overcoming numerous obstacles and challenges that every founder must face. Their accumulation leads to a phenomenon called founder's loneliness.

High-speed life

Since the pandemic, awareness of maintaining and supporting mental well-being has been steadily increasing. We are talking about problems more openly. This was visible during the June edition of the Founders Mind 2023 conference, where the issue of managing oneself and the team in a crisis often came to the fore in the speakers' presentations.

Founder's loneliness is not associated with any disease entity, this term is rather used to describe a wide range of stressogenic situations that every leader sooner or later faces, and the effects they cause in his or her well-being. His or hers - leaders are increasingly often women, and for them functioning in a world of business still heavily dominated by men involves additional burdens.

Statistically, female leaders more often than their male colleagues suffer from chronic stress-induced ailments such as depression or burnout. Founders of both sexes operate at high speed and if such a state persists for a longer period, estimated at about two years, the body and psyche eventually bill them. The price is usually high.

Sources of founder's loneliness

The beginnings of almost every business, especially the first one in a founder's career, is a time of guerrilla-like actions. Initiating any venture requires combining many different roles at once. The founder must be a one-man band. Every day there are issues requiring immediate response and action. The range of topics that the founder must at least minimally know about expands, so as not to make a mistake that would cross out the success of his budding business. At this stage, most people feel that every action requires their total commitment.

The problem is that there are more and more actions. The necessity of making all decisions is a significant psychological burden. At the initial stage of operation, it is easy to lose oneself in work at the expense of private life and relationships with loved ones. An overworked person forgets about regular consumption of valuable meals, works at the expense of sleep and falls out of any regularity. In the long run, this is destructive for him. For the business too.

- If I were to start again, I would not let others walk over me. From the beginning, I would take care of my own well-being and not worry so much about mistakes, stumbles and failures. I would value my time and skills, prioritize some issues differently. And I would definitely try to slow down a bit at an early stage - says Bartosz Duchiński, managing partner of MU Group.

Founder, you are not alone

In order to address problems, they must first be articulated, and above all - noticed. Talking to other entrepreneurs helps, but not necessarily - here friends from other areas of life, who are certainly neglected, can certainly come in handy. It is also worth keeping notes, monitoring your own thoughts and beliefs. Read after a few days, they become a valuable source of information about ourselves, help to look at ourselves from a distance and notice what may escape us every day.

The first major challenge on the founder's solitary path is learning the art of delegation. Entrusting others with tasks that have so far rested on our shoulders also involves sharing responsibility. Running a company involves a lot of pressure, so it's worth relying on a trusted team.

- Creating a startup is one of the hardest things you'll ever do. So, paraphrasing a classic - before you set off on the road, gather a team. Surround yourself with people you trust, build a support network, open up to others, and you'll really encounter few barriers you won't be able to overcome - advises Tomasz Piechnik, CCO of MU Group and CEO of Digitized.

Feedback culture

If effective and open communication becomes one of the pillars of the organization being built, the feeling of loneliness will not be so severe. This requires openness in expressing concerns, comments and dissatisfaction. However, you cannot stop there. A good leader must motivate and inspire his team. This cannot be achieved through criticism. The team needs the charisma of its leader, his optimism and courage. It's good when these are innate traits of the founder, but if it's different, they can be worked out. The founder is doomed to constant development and learning. Unfortunately, these elements cannot be passed on to members of your team.

Traps of success

Initial success carries certain risks. Carried by a wave of success and interest, we tend to engage in every emerging proposal. Fear to refuse! And sometimes you have to. If we have a clearly defined customer profile that we care about, we must learn to refuse all those who do not fit into this category. You cannot lose sight of the long-term business vision.

As a founder, you are responsible for creating and designing processes, not personally performing all duties. You need to remember this and regularly check whether we are working on the company or more in the company? These are two separate things.

- I used to think that you have to work X hours a day, be the first in the company and leave, preferably, the last. This has changed. I began to see value in doing what is needed and brings value, not just "doing as much as you can". I still have relapses of the old way of thinking, but fortunately I can notice them. Both I and the business are evolving. I strive for it to serve me, not the other way around - says Bartosz Duchiński

Work organization

Combining many threads is time-consuming. A one-man orchestra answers phones, writes emails, creates reports and defines strategies at the same time. Each of these activities suffers from this. The day has a certain number of hours, and our body - its rhythm. Days filled to the brim with various activities require careful planning. Time must be divided into thematic blocks and try to stick to it. Scattered attention destructively affects our productivity. The daily plan must include time for decompression - reading, sports, meetings with loved ones. Many world-class managers emphasize the role of regular training. Sport teaches discipline, helps in gaining awareness of our own limitations, but also possibilities. On a bad day, training will improve your mood, on a great day - it will not let you fall out of rhythm. In a healthy body, a healthy spirit, and the loneliness of the founder affects the psyche the most.

Psychological traps

What do founders struggle with? Many of them admit that from time to time they feel the "impostor syndrome". The feeling of lack of faith in one's own competences often appears when things are not going our way. The founder's mind "attacks" itself. There is also an opposite reaction, equally dangerous from the point of view of running a business: not noticing one's own role in the emerging failures. If certain situations appear regularly in the founder's life, in different human teams, it is worth analyzing your own character. We all have certain tendencies, flaws and areas that require work on ourselves.

- Many founders feel compelled to present their image of invincibility so that everyone around them trusts them. The pressure of long working days and maintaining a positive attitude in the face of constant challenges can be a really isolating experience - notes Tomasz Piechnik

Running a business is a constant emotional sine wave. Stress is associated with high levels of cortisol, and this hormone disrupts the proper functioning of the body. Racing thoughts won't let you sleep? This is a signal that its level is too high and needs to be addressed. Other alarming signals, indicating a loss of control, include frequent work at unpopular hours or a decrease in resistance to words of constructive criticism, outbursts of anger, and of course, loss of regular contact with loved ones. We cannot expect understanding and support from those we neglect. The founder should understand his own motives well. Why does he start a business? Many respondents of the report mentioned at the beginning act out of financial motivation. It's obvious. Few people at the beginning of their career, however, think about this more deeply. After all, money can't and really never is any goal - money helps to achieve certain goals. It is worth defining them and updating these definitions at every stage of building and developing a business.